How often have you yearned and pined for the perfect guy, who will love and adore you, treat you like his most prized possession? If only such a guy existed and was available and interested in you and you alone.
This is the stuff of fairy tales right?
It might just be that all of us have this all around the wrong way. How often do we ask ourselves, “what do I have that I can give away freely?” What do I have to offer family, friends or lovers for that matter.
Without many of us realizing it, the advertising world is designed to make us feel needful. After all, if we didn’t need anything, how would anyone sell anything!
This constant messaging that we are never complete, never content and need, need, need, leads us to always be looking at our shortcomings, never our strengths. We look within and think, “What I need is….” And off we go daydreaming about the charming prince who will come into our lives and make all our problems go away.
What’s far less obvious to those of us looking for love, is how obviously desperate we appear. Look around at a park full of happy loving couples. Take a look at the woman, and see how happy and cheerful she is. Look at the guy, and see how he admires her. See how thrilled he is when he makes her laugh with his silly jokes. What’s really going on here?
When you are satisfied and fulfilled within, happiness and contentment pour out of your heart. You have a happy glow that everyone notices. Obviously this is an attractive attribute, and if that person wasn’t already in a loving relationship, they would be attractive to everybody else out there looking for someone.
When you’re looking for love, you’re actually looking to take, and collect something that you feel is missing. We all do it, because it’s a trait of human nature that’s been conditioned into us.
To be wildly successful at anything, work, love, family or relationships, you need to give. Not because you think you’ll get something in return, but because the act of giving is in and of itself fulfilling. It needs to come from a place where you’re so happy and content already, you can’t hold it all in. You need to share and give it away.
The really crazy thing is, when you do this, even more comes forth increasing in abundance as it does.
So how can you put this into practice?
Rather than asking yourself what do I need. Think about all the wonderful attributes you have to offer someone else when you’re at your happiest.
Maybe you’re a warm loving happy person, and what you can provide to those around you is lovely warm smiles and sweet generous hugs. Almost like magic, some guy will notice this aspect of your personality and think “wow. I’d really like to know that lady.”
Perhaps at your best you’re a funny zany person. You have the knack of making everyone around you laugh at your antics. Again you might be at a bar or cafe, and some handsome guy notices how everyone admires your ability to make them laugh.
There’s a very old saying in business that you should “fake it till you make it.”
In a similar vein, there’s a law of attraction that says, “if you act and behave like you already have the thing you most desire, it will be yours.”
So in summary, don’t think to yourself, “what I need is…” Think to yourself, if I was madly deeply in love right now, how would I think? How would I act, and interact with others around me?
The short answer is, you’d be walking and talking like you were on Cloud 9. Get yourself into that mindset and see how much it changes your outlook, your behaviour, and ultimately, what it is that you have to give.
You might just be in for a very big surprise.
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