This post is meant to make soccer understandable for women. For this purpose, I asked Uncle some really female questions – forgive me for my ignorance – I just needed to figure out why the entire world is watching soccer right now, and nobody is chatting with me!
What is soccer for men?
A way of relaxing.
Like shopping for women.
What makes soccer good?
As anything in nature –it’s beauty.
Where does beauty come from?
It comes from the performers. There are teams who win with strategies. Some people compare soccer with religion.
I have heard of a man, who goes to the stadiums, and swears at his wife, when everybody is screaming, for he can not do it at home – he does not like scandals.
People relieve themselves when they shout in the stadium.
Is soccer easy or hard?
For good soccer players the sport is easy, for bad soccer players, it is hard.
Why is it a guy’s thing to watch soccer and drink beer?
It’s a bit traditional.
Can you compare soccer to any other sport? Aikido? Dancing?
When a soccer player makes a dribble – and passes through the enemy players – he is usually compared to a good dancer.
What does a man need to be a good soccer player?
He has to be strong and to have a very little brain.
He shouldn’t care too much about people’s opinion.
Why do the soccer players spit on the foreground?
They are flirting with the audience.
Why do they fall in such a funny way?
For a greater punishment of the adversary.
Is good soccer pleasure or tension?
Pleasure.
Are you one of the men who turn over the table when there is a goal?
No.
And what do you think of these men?
That they have bet their money on Euro Soccer.
What do you say about the definition: Soccer – they run after the ball to kick it and kick it to run after it?
A great number of soccer men are really like this.
Why has the Bulgarian team not lost a match on the World Championship for twenty years?
Because they are dreamers, but not great performers.
Which is your favorite team?
Botev, Plovdiv.
Are they good?
Sometimes. They have been my favorite team since my childhood.
Would you be a soccer player, if you could be one?
No.
How did you give up on Euro Soccer?
It is similar to the giving up on smoking.
What’s the feeling when they score a goal?
Disappointment. You can’t imagine how beautifully they are capable of missing!
When they score a goal, does the team get angry with the goal-keeper?
No, usually the goal-keeper gets angry with the team.
Does it happen good soccer players to violate intentionally other soccer players?
It happens.
Where is this aggression coming from?
Mental issues.
What do you think of a man who is sitting at the PC right now and doesn’t watch the World Championship?
That he will stay by the PC and not pay attention to a beautiful girl.
Do you have something to add in a conclusion…
I would love to go and watch live some of the Grands of the World Soccer.
I sincerely wish that for you!:)
