When My Beautiful And Smart Girlfriend Breaks Up
When does the relationship smell of disaster?
When the woman wants sex more than the man does. Sex is essential in a relationship. Trouble is lurking, if he acts inexperienced and can not satisfy you for more than five minutes in a row.
Suddenly, he breaks up with you with a text, and he does not want to see you again and explain. What, for Pete’s sake! You don’t deserve this!
Men are cowards!
All of your girlfriends exclaim that he’s a fool and a foul one! I tell to you that he’s just not worth the suffering – for the mere five minutes of pleasure…but you are of the opinion that sex is always worth it. You are right – no one complained on their death bed that he had made too much sex. So sex is good, because it’s a very frank experience between two naked people. But sex is not in the plans anymore.
You don’t want to see any sexy men until the next spring. Your first impulse is to get drunk, to indulge in a fight and to pay for sex, but you somehow gratify yourself with
just getting drunk.
I tell you to look at it in a lighter and merrier manner – he really is a jerk to behave in this way. I suggest to you to see your ex-boyfriend and console yourself, but even if he gives you fond presents, you don’t think he acts like an adult as well. You want to punish yourself with loneliness, for the lack of loveliness.
I challenge you to confess that it wasn’t a very cool relationship at all. I suggest to you to go where you are celebrated and not tolerated.
But you need to whimper, and cry and be desperate. All of this is really very cool.You are not hopeless, you are on the contrary full with hope!
full with hope!
Now, I am going to tell you a story. I once went out with a boy. He liked me very much. He said: I want you to be my girlfriend. I said – that will not happen, I do not like you. Do you know what he said: “Don’t worry at all! I am young, and you are young, and there are so many people – plenty of men and women – I will find someone to love and you will find some love as well.” That was it. No drama!
Just think what had happened between you for these two months is a variety of sort. But then you tell me you do not want variety, you want security.
Security is on the inside – I explain. Do not await your security from men. If you hold so fast to someone, you could repel him. Just take it easy – everything that happened when you were together. There is no need of all this drama, because you are beautiful, sexy and unique, and you don’t need men to be that way, men are peripheral.
But to you, they are not.
Yes, you place them on a pedestal, but when they leave, you have to dethrone them and show everyone who is the lady of the castle.
But no, you are like this
and you don’t want to change. You are romantic, you want to suffer! I am trying to take you out of your suffering balance, so that all the things you feel are not so dramatic, but you don’t want to. That is cool! You like the desperate romanticist in you. You like lines such as: “you will have to choose between me and your cigarette.” You want to experience things in a profound way, and suffer and cry, like a philosopher, and an artist, and any talented person in this world, and all of it is very nice. I used to be like this in high-school. I could cry for two hours for the boy I was in love with, for pure jealousy. But I am mature now.
But you like that girl in you who frantically needs to be emotionally connected with one special person. You do not take advice as well – you are like this, you don’t want to change and this is a brave position.
It’s all very cool because you don’t compromise with yourself. You are like Ekaterina the Great: “It will be, because I want!”
You say you just want to cuddle.
Men are cruel!
You are the cuddling type. You like the feeling that you are tiny but protected and nurtured. You love kisses on the forehead and the head. You are a strong person, and sometimes you just need to relax and let somebody else care about everything. You believe this repels men -they do not want to protect you and take care of you.
But Mae West said: “Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can’t figure out what from.” Yes. All women are tender, men are the scary ones.
You want to be defended, from the world, from the nightmares, from being tired – all kinds of things. You are like a Care Bear, that’s your nature. You are the bear with the lion’s heart. You will find love, because love is what you are and if somebody loves water, he already loves 90 percent of you.